Filling Buckets

Updated: Sep 29, 2020

Have you filled a bucket today?

A couple of years ago a good friend of mine was telling me about this amazing concept of buckets. No, it wasn’t about cleaning merchandise. It was about a concept her children learned in school – a bucket of positive behaviours that enforce a positive state of mind.

It goes like this: everyone has an invisible bucket. By everyone it means – EVERYONE, even your unsupportive boss… When our bucket is full, we feel happy and when it is empty, we feel sad. Very simple, isn’t it? Now you probably ask (if you haven’t figured it out by now) ‘how do I fill my bucket?’ and the answer is by expressing kindness behaviour to the people around us. We do something nice to someone else and we fill their buckets.

Ok, but I asked about my bucket! You claim… Well, the beautiful thing is that by filling someone else’s bucket, we fill our buckets too.

And the opposite goes that way as well, when we behave unkindly and wickedly to others, we empty their buckets, and yes, you guessed it right, we also empty ours.

So for example when you help someone carry their heavy box to their desk or tell a colleague or someone you know that you appreciate their work, or even tell your partner that you love them; you fill their buckets with appreciation, self of achievement, pride and joy and you probably, without even noticing it, fill yours as well. However, when you talk about someone behind their back and when you neglect to see the good intention behind their doings or when you sit still on your seat on the train without looking around you to see if someone desperately needs to sit, or even not smiling to your partner and wish them good morning, you’re quietly putting your bucket in a very dark place and drying it out.

What a concept! If we stop for a minute from our busy lives and think about it, I think we can all relate to that and agree that it is true. We always interact with people; with our family, when we’re doing our groceries, when we’re on the train or at work. When we show kindness and smile or offer our hand, people around us feel good and yes, it makes us feel good too. When we are impatient or talk viciously behind someone’s back, we feel low.

Following the conversation with my friend, I purchased the book – Have you filled your bucket today? By Carol McCloud and let’s just make it clear; it if targeted for children and written beautifully, but who says that adults can’t learn from children?

As you know, I read the book and was charmed by it. I was so excited by the idea that I have started buying it as birthday presents, Christmas Presents and simply presents because I felt like it. However, like any relationship, which starts with high tones, after a while, when you are used to the idea, you start questioning yourself. Well, you see, there were mornings when I woke up starting my day and my bucket was empty. I asked myself how come? What has made my bucket empty today? And I have started questioning myself by asking what comes first?! (The chicken or the egg kind of question…) The behaviour, the emotion or the thought? Is it the emotion or is it the action?

For a few years I have started exploring that field of awareness and behaviour. I used my skills and knowledge from my training in CTI (Co-active Training Institute), was exposed to CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy), the Kabbalah idea of Cristal Eye, started to follow Tony Robbins, modern psychology, Law of attraction and more and realised a few things and I wish to share with you at least one of them. And you can call it anyway you want, and use any terminology you wish, but the more you think about it and raise your awareness to your being, you became enchanted by the idea that thoughts create emotions and emotions create actions.

Now take a few minutes to think about it. You wake up in the morning; the first thing you do is - you think. Your head is filled with thoughts. Many thoughts. The thoughts are running in your head like a carousel sometimes. There are so many; about yesterday and your today. About people and tasks, about your children, body, boss, posted notes, diet, train ride, nose, car fix, partner… so many thoughts penetrate your mind and before you know it, in a split of a second; your emotions are triggered. Then you either jump out of bed with enthusiasm and appreciation or with a big chunk of heaviness, anger and grime.

There’s no doubt in my mind that thoughts trigger emotions. And when I go back to the magnificent bucket; I find no questions as I know that when I wake up in the morning and train my thoughts to look at the good things I have in life and appreciate them, and from that joyful and emotional positive state, I also decide that today I will fill someone else’s bucket. My mind and thoughts are focused on doing good to someone else, and I know that I will feel good too by doing so. Law of attraction will come to force and many buckets will be filled.

Have you tried it before?

Tell me what you have experienced.

Healthy mind, healthy body they say.

What do you think? What comes first?

@Keren Menashe

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